10/4/12

Prosciutto – Hamming it up with the di Parmas, Part d’Cinque!

By Undercovergeek, 4 October 2012

A Crusader Kings II AAR, with all the seriousness of a cooler full of lunch meat

click images to enlarge

 

In Part 4 Oberto conquered Genoa, but its set up is incorrect and it’s imposing huge financial punishment on the house of di Parma. To help all other aspiring Counts rise to the seats of Dukes and Kings we enlisted the help of Jennifer Aniston to explain how to fix it. In Part 5 the fix is completed and Oberto spies a Duchy.

 

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The treasonous and defeated Baron Lando is cordially invited to try out Oberto’s new dungeon. This time he has no choice about giving me the castle and his barony. I am proud I started a war of Tyranny.

 

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As you can see the main seat of Genoa has returned to being a castle.

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09/26/12

Prosciutto – Hamming it up with the di Parmas, Part Foooooouuuuuuur!


By Undercovergeek, 26 September 2012

A Crusader Kings II AAR, with all the seriousness of a cooler full of lunch meat

click images to enlarge

 

In Part 3 the long awaited claim on Genoa was finally written. With extraordinary good timing Parma marched on the city, now with extraordinary bad timing the Genoese have come back for their province………….

 

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That was quick – only recently sent to Genoa’s neighbouring province Nice, claims are fabricated and we can expand even further. Together Genoa and Nice make up the Duchy of Genoa, hopefully our first ‘promotion’ from Count to Duke.
In the background (all these messages came up at once) you can see the two ‘post battle’ armies of Genoa (985) and Parma (948). Genoa only just won the first round and is now ‘reseiging’ the City of Genoa back from me whilst Oberto is forced to withdraw to Parma.

 

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Having marched back to Parma in shame Oberto keeps the mercenaries but disbands his own army. In doing so it allows him to draw fresh levies from the provinces and march straight back to Genoa with a bigger force this time. Exhausted from the first battle and having low morale from attempting to storm the walls of the City, the Genoans are soundly beaten and kicked back into Nice. It’s the Doge’s only province, we get a 100% warscore immediately and force him to give up the place.

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09/15/12

Prosciutto – Hamming it up with the di Parmas, Part the Third

By Undercovergeek, 15 September 2012

A Crusader Kings II AAR, with all the seriousness of a cooler full of lunch meat

 

In Part 2 the foundations of my budding dynasty were built. Taxes were raised for the inevitable troubles ahead and the next generation of di Parmas were conceived.

 

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Oberto Junior (from my ‘struck from the records’ first marriage) comes of age. He is a Grey Eminence, giving him a massive Diplomacy boost, he will make someone a kick ass Chancellor, and he ummmm, wears a bonnet? A beret? I’m told he’s down with the medieval kids.

 

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This can’t be good, my liege Duchess Matilda declares independence from the HRE. The Kaiser says no and sends forth his troops. I didn’t think I’d be involved but I have a warscore counter on the screen – I’m just going to keep my head down and hope he doesn’t see our county.

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09/2/12

Prosciutto – Hamming it up with the di Parmas, part 2

By Undercovergeek, 2 September 2012

A Crusader Kings II AAR, with all the seriousness of a cooler full of lunch meat

as before, click images to enlarge

 

In our previous installment I was clawing my way up the social ladder one marriage at a time. First I married a rather lustful but socially anonymous woman with the hope that I would be able to at least procreate several children. As the time ripened

 

I arranged the marriages of my daughter and son to well-connected nobility…

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The marriage is approved, I take the Prestige as opposed to the money, I have a small amount of money – but no Prestige.

CKII

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08/27/12

Prosciutto – Hamming it up with the di Parmas, Part 1


By Undercovergeek, 27 August 2012

A Crusader Kings II AAR, with all the seriousness of a cooler full of lunch meat

click images to enlarge

Welcome all, as previously discussed on the forumandvoted for by your goodselves we’re going to chart the rise (hopefully) of the di Parmas. Starting as a count and hopefully working our way up to Holy Roman Emperor or at least King, and unifying Italy on the way – small goals I know, but we have to start somewhere.

 

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Here I am – interesting flick over parting and shaved sides hair-do, but other than that I’m rolling with the sexy Italian look. Dad’s still alive and he’s the Martial of our lands – which consist of Parma, and Corsica. I’ve got 2 kids, and I’m unmarried – their mother seems to have been struck from the family records – god knows what unholy sin she must have committed.

 

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Son and heir, Oberto. I like him, he hates me – he’s been tutored by Micaela di Massa, some random courtier from Parma of no outstanding qualities at all – this maybe the cause of our fractious relationship and his crappy stats, that and his slight concern that he looks exactly like all other noble children in the realm, it troubles him.

 

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