CHAPTER NINE: YOU CAN’T UNSEE IT

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The last time I saw anything that disgusting was when a dancer named ‘Wolf 359’ bent herself so far over, she turned into a singularity and disappeared. I will not watch movies about people eating people any more. I have people to do that for me. The idea is sound, but there’s no reason the leader should be exposed to such trauma.

I’m staring at a pretty decent fleet, though it’s very civ-heavy. Meaning, more Troop Transports and Colony Ships than actual ships that can ‘bring the pain.’ Since we’re all flower children more or less, having a gigantic fleet-in-being is not only not conducive with Federation aims, it’s also a huge drain on the economy. It’s still early yet and I need to do some more colonizing so I can do some more taxing and graftin’ (daddy gotta get HIS) to support a large fleet. For purely defensive purposes, of course. And so far, my expansion is small, though that will change soon. I don’t like the idea of being spread out and having no good ships to defend myself should big ol’ greenie meanies come sniffing around my people like they’re sides of beef (Soylent Green was MY idea, after all).

Thing is, in Birth of the Federation, the Federation gets huge penalties for being war-like. Doing things like bombing planets into dust will piss off the population at large, so a little alien cleansing…IF we actually find aliens, that is…is not on the to-do list. But, I like to bring it up during the staff meetings every so often, just to see how many shades of pale I can make everyone sitting around the table.

God, it’s good to be the king.

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CHAPTER 8: STILL WHERE NO MAN HAS GONE BEFORE

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As space has nothing BUT time while it passes…time, it’s been a while since the last AAR. Technically, I’ve been busy, but untechnically, I’ve been touring our newest colonies. MURICA. I mean, uhh, FEDER…uh…FEDERMURICA.

So anyway, let’s take a look at where we’re at right now. Shall we? Yes, let’s.

Here’s our slice of the galaxy. We’ve explored…well, not much. Humans are lazy! I should start popping pills into their synthe-tribble ribs to make them move faster. Then again, we can only move as fast as my little Troop Transports and Colony Ships can carry my children. (I know I’m totally working up some delusions of grandeur, but when you technically have total control over an entire empire…well, stuff happens.)

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Part 7: Manifest Destiny Ahoy!

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 The last time I recorded the greatness that is my reign as…uh, I mean…the last time I recorded the greatness of the expansion of the peace-loving Federation…was, we had named our ship after some town in northeastern North America so irrelevant it didn’t even get nuked. Or blown up during the Eugenics Wars. Pick your history and stick with it; we’ve got a train of human expansion to ride!

That didn’t sound as good on paper as it did in my head…

So, while the other fledgling colonies scrape and work hard to survive out there in the cold vastness of alien worlds (alien to us, not “aliens” – not yet anyway – shudder), Sol trucks right along. I decide to fill its production queue with a few ships. I like to change things up when shipbuilding to be prepared for any eventuality. Right now our NX-01s are stationary on the edges of their range and unable to do any more splorin’, so I need to get a few Troop Transports in, balanced with a Colony Ship and another NX-01.

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Part 6: The Next Dumb Name for an NX-01 is…

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The Troop Transport to our Galactic West has been built! For the first time in human history, we are able to push our borders back further into the inky void. I send a message to the skipper of the Seadragon to send me back a T-Shirt. He doesn’t get it. I tell him to just grab a souvenir or something. I thump on the microphone. What is this, an oil painting or an audience?  Continue reading →

Part 5: Muh-muh-muh MYYY SARONA

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While that Troop Transport makes its way to the Sarona system, where my bounty of Dilithium awaits exploitation, I’ve moved my Colony ship to the neighboring Altair system. Altair is not on my short-term plans to colonize, but while I’m waiting on the Troop Transport to arrive and build an outpost, I can go ahead and terraform the planets in this system so it will be ready later.

Meanwhile back in the Sol system, my next NX-01 peak of technological exploration, my spearpoint of…uh, exploration…is nearing completion. I’ve gone ahead and queued a couple more Troop Transports so I can send them to the Galactic North and East of Sol to help expand the borders that way.

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