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Prosciutto – Hamming it up with the di Parmas, parto 32-o!

You missed the first 30 episodes?  You bad person.  Go read them all first, then come back here.

In Part 31 Benvenuto continued his Father’s ambition to become King of Sicily and assaulted the island and Sultan Yahya – its Muslim ruler.

A counter attack in Benvenuto’s homeland was beaten back by the Emperor’s forces, and the men of Salerno marched onto Malta with the aid of the Knights Templar.

Advised by his war council that more territory would need to be captured to force his demands for Sicily, Benvenuto needs to set sail for Northern Africa to take on the Sultan’s forces in his home territory. In this part, victorious Templars, a new beard, and a cool new hat.

 

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After a lot of bloodshed, a lot of retreating, regrouping and restorming, Malta finally falls to Benvenuto and the Templars. With a warscore of 90% its still not enough to force a full surrender – to Africa!!!!!!!

 

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Meanwhile in Bari……… Croatia comes back to take the region from the beaten down Muslims. So enraged is Benvenuto he grows an extra long beard and it turns white

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Captain Giovanni hands the bloodied pennants of Yahya the Fat to Benvenuto, ‘It is done my Lord, all hail Salerno’. ‘Was he really fat?’, ‘Oh hell, massive, Yahya was so fat……’ And thus the ‘Your Yahya is so fat’ jokes were born

 

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Back at home Croatia finally seals the victory in Bari and Apulia, leaving Foggia to the Muslims – this will all get sorted later, probably by Oberto II

 

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Why not, plus we spent a lot of piety calling up the Templars

 

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With enough land to stomp on any dissenters, Benvenuto claims the Duchy of Sicily from Emir Abd Allah the Merry. ‘I don’t think these Muslims are getting their titles quite right Giovanni’, ‘Your Allah was so merry…’ but these jokes didnt take on as much

 

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Benvenuto’s pride and joy, Flavia finally gets a ring when the King of England comes of age, as the Queen of England shes pulling in some serious allies for Benvenuto

 

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NOT YET YOU OLD B******

 

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With the Duchy of Sicily and Salerno united enough power is granted to Benvenuto to go for the big one. He sends a strongly worded letter to King Antonio and takes the crown.

 

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With absolutely no skills in Diplomacy, but a sword arm like a tree trunk, Benvenuto, son of Oberto becomes King of Sicily, and with a helicopter devised 400 years before that bloke Da Vinci takes a snap shot of his Southern territories to put on the fireplace. Next up, probably back to Matilda to rub her nose in it, and then get the ‘Big Book of Making Italy’ out of the library


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