DGS Games

GrogHeads Announces Sale of Website

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

1 April 2015

 

GrogHeads is pleased to announce the sale of our URL to the American Rum Manufacturers’ Association (ARMA), for the purpose of hosting their newly-announced club for fans of heritage brews of the “pirate era” (1650-1840).  GrogHeads anticipates a smooth transition of content from game-focused material to greater alcohol-focused articles, including mixology, sourcing, and recovery tips.

“We are thrilled with the acquisition of the GrogHeads brand” stated ARMA’s CEO, Cordwainer Bird. “Not only is the ‘Grog’ term already strongly identified with the focus of our material, but the forum conversations of the current membership of the site indicate they already spend much of their days deeply inebriated, putting them squarely in our core demographic for the new Grog Heads club.”

“We are excited about the new direction of Grog Heads,” remarked Chief Check-Cashing Officer Craig Handler.  “Especially since my direction is now ‘South’ toward the private island I was able to afford.”

“Honestly, I don’t expect to see many changes,” noted Brant Guillory, former content manager.  “The forums will still be a mixture of insanity, debauchery, and bad puns, and no one will ever notice the front page is something different.”

Among the new features planned for the forums are an “auto-ignore” criteria that members can set to filter posts from other members based on a lengthy questionnaire of previous media consumption (such as classic movies and TV shows), musical preferences, knowledge of obscure comic-book continuity trivia, or preference for real-time vs turn-based games.  Thus when a previously-deficient forum members reclaims his man card by eventually watching Saving Private Ryan, for instance, his posts will now appear in your forum view, as they would be above your auto-ignore threshold,

Watch for the new website rollout over the next 72 hours.  Or don’t.  Since you’re not likely watching the front page anyway.


 

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2 Responses to GrogHeads Announces Sale of Website

  1. Vance says:

    I, for one, welcome our new booze overlords!.

  2. DennisS says:

    Pretty nice April Fools gag!

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