One for Metal Dog

Started by bayonetbrant, September 08, 2014, 05:29:52 AM

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bayonetbrant

#2700
November 08, 2017, 06:48:54 AM
we've had some of these before, but they're still funny

The key to surviving this site is to not say something which ends up as someone's tag line - Steelgrave

"their citizens (all of them counted as such) glorified their mythology of 'rights'...and lost track of their duties. No nation, so constituted, can endure." Robert Heinlein, Starship Troopers

besilarius

#2701
November 08, 2017, 07:28:49 AM
Good list.
It's not just that they are funny, these are good.
"Most gods throw dice, but Fate plays chess, and you don't find out until too late that he's been playing with two queens all along".  Terry Pratchett.

During filming of Airplane, Leslie Nielsen used a whoopee cushion to keep the cast off-balance. Hays said that Nielsen "played that thing like a maestro"

Tallulah Bankhead: "I'll come and make love to you at five o'clock. If I'm late, start without me."

"When all other trusts fail, turn to Flashman." — Abraham Lincoln.

"I have enjoyed very warm relations with my two husbands."
"With your eyes closed?"
"That helped."  Lauren Bacall

Master Chiefs are sneaky, dastardly, and snarky miscreants who thrive on the tears of Ensigns and belly dancers.   Admiral Gerry Bogan.

Pete Dero

#2702
November 08, 2017, 08:04:43 AM
Quote from: bayonetbrant on November 08, 2017, 06:48:54 AM
we've had some of these before, but they're still funny


Made me think of these :



Emeraldlis

#2703
November 11, 2017, 06:17:25 AM
Quote from: bayonetbrant on November 08, 2017, 06:48:54 AM
we've had some of these before, but they're still funny



'dyslexic man walks into a bra'....... Hahahaha, funniest joke there, just priceless :2funny: to be fair, they are all really good jokes  ;)  ;D
"Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm " winston Churchill 😉
"Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune , or to take arms against a sea of trouble ,and by opposing end them "  hamlet  🎭

A bad hobbit is hard to break - Staggerwing
Booooo!!!!! Repeat !!!!!!!   - MetalDog

MetalDog

#2704
November 11, 2017, 10:07:37 AM
If by, 'really good,' you mean, 'so terrible as to hurt my eyes from reading them and my mind from their horrible-ness,' then yes, I totally agree  O0
And the One Song to Rule Them All is Gimme Shelter - Rolling Stones


"If its a Balrog, I don't think you get an option to not consent......." - bob

bayonetbrant

#2705
November 11, 2017, 10:51:08 AM
The key to surviving this site is to not say something which ends up as someone's tag line - Steelgrave

"their citizens (all of them counted as such) glorified their mythology of 'rights'...and lost track of their duties. No nation, so constituted, can endure." Robert Heinlein, Starship Troopers

Emeraldlis

#2706
November 11, 2017, 12:09:20 PM
Quote from: MetalDog on November 11, 2017, 10:07:37 AM
If by, 'really good,' you mean, 'so terrible as to hurt my eyes from reading them and my mind from their horrible-ness,' then yes, I totally agree  O0



Well then... Here's another to wrap your mind around, lol, wouldn't want to deprive you of the awesomeness of our puns!!!!!   ;)
"Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm " winston Churchill 😉
"Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune , or to take arms against a sea of trouble ,and by opposing end them "  hamlet  🎭

A bad hobbit is hard to break - Staggerwing
Booooo!!!!! Repeat !!!!!!!   - MetalDog

bayonetbrant

#2707
November 11, 2017, 02:58:32 PM
The key to surviving this site is to not say something which ends up as someone's tag line - Steelgrave

"their citizens (all of them counted as such) glorified their mythology of 'rights'...and lost track of their duties. No nation, so constituted, can endure." Robert Heinlein, Starship Troopers

besilarius

#2708
November 11, 2017, 04:13:02 PM
Emily Litella was so right.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fZLeaSWY37I
"Most gods throw dice, but Fate plays chess, and you don't find out until too late that he's been playing with two queens all along".  Terry Pratchett.

During filming of Airplane, Leslie Nielsen used a whoopee cushion to keep the cast off-balance. Hays said that Nielsen "played that thing like a maestro"

Tallulah Bankhead: "I'll come and make love to you at five o'clock. If I'm late, start without me."

"When all other trusts fail, turn to Flashman." — Abraham Lincoln.

"I have enjoyed very warm relations with my two husbands."
"With your eyes closed?"
"That helped."  Lauren Bacall

Master Chiefs are sneaky, dastardly, and snarky miscreants who thrive on the tears of Ensigns and belly dancers.   Admiral Gerry Bogan.

bayonetbrant

#2709
November 11, 2017, 07:28:25 PM
The world needs an all-female team of bodybuilding pirates

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They can call themselves The Cut Lasses
The key to surviving this site is to not say something which ends up as someone's tag line - Steelgrave

"their citizens (all of them counted as such) glorified their mythology of 'rights'...and lost track of their duties. No nation, so constituted, can endure." Robert Heinlein, Starship Troopers

BanzaiCat

#2710
November 11, 2017, 07:35:43 PM
^ First thing I thought was, "that could be a good name for a Roller Derby team."

A moment of Google-Fu and...of course it is.

https://www.facebook.com/The-Cut-Lasses-Joondalup-370058525968/

Emeraldlis

#2711
November 11, 2017, 09:10:34 PM
Quote from: bayonetbrant on November 11, 2017, 07:28:25 PM
The world needs an all-female team of bodybuilding pirates

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

.
.
.
.
.
.
.

They can call themselves The Cut Lasses

Omg..........  :DD I wanna join!!!!!! I'm from Lancashire, I'm a lass... I'm half way there  :arr:
"Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm " winston Churchill 😉
"Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune , or to take arms against a sea of trouble ,and by opposing end them "  hamlet  🎭

A bad hobbit is hard to break - Staggerwing
Booooo!!!!! Repeat !!!!!!!   - MetalDog

bayonetbrant

#2712
November 13, 2017, 09:53:28 AM
pizza delivery in China

The key to surviving this site is to not say something which ends up as someone's tag line - Steelgrave

"their citizens (all of them counted as such) glorified their mythology of 'rights'...and lost track of their duties. No nation, so constituted, can endure." Robert Heinlein, Starship Troopers

bayonetbrant

#2713
November 13, 2017, 09:50:33 PM
The key to surviving this site is to not say something which ends up as someone's tag line - Steelgrave

"their citizens (all of them counted as such) glorified their mythology of 'rights'...and lost track of their duties. No nation, so constituted, can endure." Robert Heinlein, Starship Troopers

BanzaiCat

#2714
November 14, 2017, 07:01:49 AM
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