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Started by Marty Ward, July 13, 2016, 02:13:26 PM

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Marty Ward

July 13, 2016, 02:13:26 PM
"Scorned husband dies after wife crushes his TESTICLES with her HANDS
A MAN suffered an agonising death after his wife grabbed his TESTICLES and crushed them in her grip for five minutes."

http://www.express.co.uk/news/world/689201/Scorned-husband-dies-wife-crushes-testicles-Vietnam
If it looks like chicken, tastes like chicken, and feels like chicken but Chuck Norris says its beef, then it's beef.

If women had apostrophes instead of periods they would be even more possessive!

Sir Slash

#1
July 13, 2016, 10:46:47 PM
I'm thinking that she's gonna be a widow the rest of her life.
"Take a look at that". Sgt. Wilkerson-- CMBN. His last words after spotting a German tank on the other side of a hedgerow.

Silent Disapproval Robot

#2
July 14, 2016, 02:40:19 PM
Or a genital mediator.

Dammit Carl!

#3
July 14, 2016, 02:45:49 PM
So...yeah thats bad and all of that, but is she hot?  She is, after all, now single.   :coolsmiley:

besilarius

#4
July 14, 2016, 08:55:44 PM
One of the Ottoman Sultans after Suleimon the Magnificent objected to being visited by the Nine Mutes (and their bowstrings).
He put up such a fight that the Grand Vizier grabbed him until he passed out from the pain.  Then the Mutes did the deed.
"Most gods throw dice, but Fate plays chess, and you don't find out until too late that he's been playing with two queens all along".  Terry Pratchett.

During filming of Airplane, Leslie Nielsen used a whoopee cushion to keep the cast off-balance. Hays said that Nielsen "played that thing like a maestro"

Tallulah Bankhead: "I'll come and make love to you at five o'clock. If I'm late, start without me."

"When all other trusts fail, turn to Flashman." — Abraham Lincoln.

"I have enjoyed very warm relations with my two husbands."
"With your eyes closed?"
"That helped."  Lauren Bacall

Master Chiefs are sneaky, dastardly, and snarky miscreants who thrive on the tears of Ensigns and belly dancers.   Admiral Gerry Bogan.

Sir Slash

#5
July 14, 2016, 10:30:28 PM
They'd play hell trying to find mine at my age. I haven't even seen them in a couple of days. They might be in my other pants so, they're probably in the washing machine.
"Take a look at that". Sgt. Wilkerson-- CMBN. His last words after spotting a German tank on the other side of a hedgerow.
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