Gettin’ scrambly wit’ it…

By Brant Guillory, GrogDude

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We made a bunch of new city-state friends and renewed our vows with Maria, but we still have no clue how we’re actually doing in the game.

Bye, Bye Workers
Unlike the French, I get to fire workers when I’m running out of things for them to do, and I’ve got enough workers to continue to improve the land I have left.

Last Cultural Achievement
Not a lot to choose from here, eh?

Well, OK, I didn’t have much choice
I either lie to you and grab my land anyway, or don’t grab it and get elbowed off the continent.

Sort of curious…
Where the hell do these Mayflower Pilgrims think they’re going in the middle of a fully-settled continent?

Hey, Not Just Any Musician
A GREAT Musician!

Excess Cotton Outbound
Her excess money, inbound

Excess Vino Outbound
OK, trick caption. There’s never been such a thing as “excess” vino.

Not Just Any Work
A GREAT work! Besides, we’re not going to try to influence the surrounding culture with a concert tour. We’re going to sit here all xenophobic-like and just enjoy our own tunes. Basically, we’re being Texans.

Hey, I Like Shiny Things!
I just don’t have enough of them!

Hey, Not Just Any Writer
OK, that joke’s old now.

Ulundi’s Production Queue
We’re going to build what we can to get closer to what we think we need for victory – culture and happiness – and the put it all into money.

Hey, Not Just Any Work
A collection of fantabulous puns that will delight our audience and enrich their lives. And will never Boer them to tears.

Ah, Irony
Instead we get MetalDog’s anti-pun suicide note.

Let’s Be Friends!
I’m like a Victorian-era Facebook slut – I accept every friend request that comes my way. Never know when you’ll need ’em!

And Then You Get Friends of Friends
And soon the whole world is singing Kum-Ba-Ya!

See?!
One big happy continent. They must love my puns.

MOAR FRENDZ!
I’ve already had some Occo. Now I want Mor-occo!

Barbarians
My lancers will be able to clean these guys out in short order, and curry some favor with the local city-states. But city-state bonuses don’t matter in scenarios where there’s no World Congress, and there’s not enough time for a lot of influence-swapping.

Farms
Lots and lots of farms. There were a few tiles in mid-build when we had to pause for that last little War-of-Zulu-Extinction. Time to go back and finish them up.

Oh Yeah, and Farms!
If it’s a tile I can reach, I’m farming it.

Will our Boers continue to make hay while the sun shines?

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